Week 52: Firstborn

My first born. My daughter.

With her daddy’s blue eyes,

and her momma’s turned nose

and a personality all her own.

Born amidst a sea of women

who loved you and held you and cried

over your tiny hands and feet.

Long fingers for piano

for basketball

for reaching out and grabbing hold.

Your daddy stepped forward,

grinning proudly, cut the cord

that bound you to me;

this snipping, this severing,

this first step out on your own

only strengthened the other,

the invisible

that bound you to me.

In my heart I knew:

I would love you forever

through broken vases and curfews

and poor manners and grades.

You were mine

in my arms

a tiny girl of infinite worth.

You looked at me.

I looked at you.

Two first borns.

I poured milk into your sweet tummy

as I poured loved into your sweet soul.

I loved you inch by inch,

by sound, by moment

For your sleepy laughter

And milkdrunk smiles.

Later, you looked again,

eyebrows raised in wonder,

and I cherished the double birth:

yours to life, mine to maternity,

both of us first born.

Crawling at six months

Sitting at seven

Teeth at eight

Stepping at nine

Walking at ten.

The numbers of movement

In which you never cease.

Alas, not even for sleep.

And from here, this year,

this moving forward without fear

I promise you hugs daily

Kisses hourly

And a lifetime of love.

We, two first borns, walking this path together

Two shiny pairs of shoes

With some blisters along the way.

My wish, my hope, my dream for you:

to love life

to laugh often

to not grow bitter from heartache

to pray for strength, honesty, wisdom, life.

You never want to hold my hand,

but I’ll be here anyway

chasing after you

and reminding you that we two

must love each other to weather

the storm of growing up.

That is my promise to you,

The promise of one first born

to another.

Comments

[raehan]

That is simply, but so proufoundly beautiful. Can I add that to your favorites?

[Stout]

gives me the goose bumps, in a good way. by they way, i eventually get your posts, i think they just take a while? i don't know.

[rachelle]

That is so beautiful....I have tears in my eyes.

[Rachel]

Said perfectly!

[Tiffiny]

Beautiful. I have tears from reading this it describes perfectly the wonderful bond between a mother and her first born.

[Giao]

Intensely beautiful, wonderful love. You are quite talented and blessed and fantastic!! Sydney will surely cherish this lovely message from you for many lifetimes.

[Lu]

I love her little curly mohawk. She is a beautiful child.

[dawn]

So beautiful! The poem & Sydney!

[melanie]

Beautiful words... What a wonderful expression of a mother's love!

[kim]

That was beautiful, Stephanie. Sydney is absolutely adorable!

[thesoulofhope]

Beautiful! And I love the photos!!

[ccap]

Well thanks so much for making me cry at work. Positively lovely!

[Marie]

Just beautiful! I'm the mom of a 15-month old (first born, also). My eyes are filled with tears, and I'm sooo relating.... Happy birthday, sweet baby girl!