In a flurry of exhaustion and music and lines and dancing, the show is over. It was, to put it mildly, a very busy week. Two shows on Thursday. Show Friday. Two shows on Saturday. Somewhere in there I had two papers to write for my grad class (which I did on the laptop in between scenes backstage). Somewhere in there I also managed to teach a class. I don't clearly remember those parts, but they got finished. I also recognized that the house hasn't totally fallen apart, but I suspect Jason had a lot to do with this part. A huge thank you to those of you who encouraged me through this past week with your comments and emails (and supported me during the shows...Dads, Moms, Grandmas, friendly friends and former students).
In the end, Into the Woods grew on me. It was a rather difficult musical to learn and rehearse, but once we got it down then I actually enjoyed it...most of the time. There were the few dance steps that I missed. The line I botched. The scene in which I never showed up (the performance that they videotaped, naturally!). But I never forgot the words to any of my solos (my perpetual fear). And I never lost my temper at anyone backstage because I really did love my castmates to bits. I did have a few impatient moments with the director, but I'm hoping she didn't notice too much.
The biggest accomplishment, however, is how I'm feeling today. To be sure, I'm exhausted. My throat hurts, my muscles ache, my eyes are bloodshot. But other than being physically worn out, I'm not feeling the emotional drain that usually accompanies my theatre involvement. That is not to say that at some point last week I wasn't feeling that. Wednesday night was my ultimate lowpoint: stressed out, exhausted, depressed, and furious at the director. But then Thursday came, and I felt better (and relieved that I hadn't blogged about my anger).
In fact, I woke up today feeling really optimistic. Maybe it's because it's Spring. Maybe it's because the sun was shining. But mostly I think it's because two major commitments have wrapped up: the play, and my graduate class. I hadn't realized until this week that I had picked up three major obligations in January: teaching a class, taking a class, and acting in the show. Add to that the stress of some serious personal difficulties, and it's a wonder I didn't fall apart completely.
But I didn't.
I made it.
It's exhilarating to wake up on the side of survival. The side that is full of God's faithfulness, my husband's devotion, my daughter's exuberance. The side that gives me back a little of what I gave up in January: Time.
I tell you what, I'm just giddy about it. So giddy I'm not even fretting about Michigan State losing in the stinking first round when I had them in the Elite Eight. It's all good. Because it's all mine. I made some positive decisions about my life this past week, some of which I will try to articulate this week. I also have plans to catch up on all my blog reading that I have neglected this past week (and I can tell from bloglines that you have been doing a lot of writing!).
But right now, I'm going to use my time to do laundry. Let the good times roll.