I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again: I love summer. I love the sunshine, the warm weather, tshirts and shorts and flip flops. We spent the last two weeks at the Family Farm, and I could wax on and on about the many adventures we had outside, but all those thoughts are still trapped in my head.
Because, you see, the downside to warm weather is that right around 6 pm or so, I start to feel that familiar ache right behind my left eye. I dutifully take some Excedrin (as I have to do every day, much to the dismay of my kidneys, I'm sure), hoping that one tablet will take care of it. Pshaw, says the area right behind my left eye, ONE Excedrin? Really. You know better than that.
I am, to a fault, hopelessly optimistic that every headache I have is actually a headache rather than a migraine. The last time I had a regular headache that went away on it's own? Hmm. Maybe when I was 14?
The awful truth is that I don't get headaches. Ever. I get migraines. They don't go away on their own. I can't sleep them off. I can't exercise them away. I can only hope to catch them before the nausea and vomiting start. Last semester I had to cancel my afternoon class twice because I couldn't stand up, which is why I now almost always carry a bottle of Excedrin with me everywhere I go. (There is no point bothering with candy medication like Advil or Tylenol.)
Unfortunately for me, in the summer I get migraines almost every day, presumably because of the heat and maybe dehydration. Except--and here's the real kicker--when I'm pregnant. Then I never get migraines. You'd think this might motivate me to get pregnant more often, except that the results of pregnancy mean more migraines for me (yes, parenting is hard on my poor, weak brain), so it would really be such a vicious circle that would only end up with me in a dark room, with a cool washcloth on my face, wishing that the birds outside would shut up already. It's hard to parent that way. Trust me, I've tried.
So, right now, as I'm typing with my eyes closed only to occasionally open them, squinting at the computer screen and really wanting to write about Sydney's very first professional manicure, and how she wakes up every day and breathlessly exclaims, "Oh, Mama! My nails are still so, so beautiful" I can't quite form all those thoughts in my head due to the halos of light around everything and feeling more consciously aware of the pain traveling oh so slowly towards the back of my head and a bit toward the right. And more than manicures, my thoughts are focused along the lines of should I take two extra-strength Excedrin, or should I just bypass the next three hours of minor league pain and go straight for the Excedrin for Migraines even though it means in about 4 hours I'll wake up from the high dosage of caffeine which will keep me awake for about two hours?
I am thankful that my migraines can be controlled by over the counter medication, but I do find it tedious that every single night when what I'd love to be writing or reading, but instead I'm rubbing peppermint oil on my temples, massaging my eyebrows, drinking water, and checking the clock to see if enough time has elapsed for me to take another Excedrin. You'd think with all this pain I'd stop loving summer, but I don't. It's still my favorite time of the year.
And I'll always hold out hope that maybe tomorrow--another blistering hot day--I won't get a migraine, even though the odds are against me. Okay, the pain has moved to my right eye, so off I go.