Once, many many years ago, someone asked me when Jason and I were going to have kids. My knee-jerk response was always never, but then once we got past that I said, "Well, we'd like to have a house. And I'd like to be done with my masters degree. And it'd be nice to be debt free too."
I don't remember who it was I was talking to, but she said, "If you're waiting to have all your ducks in a row, you'll be waiting a long time."
I feel like that's what happened to me and blogging these past two months. "When are you going to blog again?" Jason asked. I've had a lot of reasons: "When the house is clean," or "When the laundry is put away" [it's not the washing that kills me, it's the folding and putting away that gets me]. Or "After I lesson plan," or "I'm so tired. I can't even think straight."
It's not that I don't have something to say. I always have something to say. It's that I've felt perpetually two steps behind, a day late, a dollar short, too many hats, too many balls in the air, underwater and climbing uphill.
The feeling that is otherwise known as Life in general.
But today is the first day of October, and so here I am. And I'm going to blog every day this month because I don't want to blog every day next month.
Full disclosure: I'm gonna do some catching up because lots of important stuff happened in September (and, um, in August too, in fact). It's all good though, right? Pictures. Stories. Who cares if it didn't happen yesterday.
Here we go.
I completed Addie's Numbers more or less on time.
Here she is two weeks before her birthday.
And then a week--actually, just a few days--before her birthday, she got to do a test run on the cupcake eating action that would be happening at her party.
Then there was the party, followed by the Big Day.
Remember way back in the beginning, Addie started out in the apple orchard? And here she is, a year later.
OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS! My baby is all grown up. What has happened to this year?!
Somehow in a matter of twelve months, Addie managed to get 8 teeth. Which she uses to eat apples. And bite me to get my attention.
In twelve months, she went from a squishy mushy bag of sugar, to a bag of sugar able to stand on her own two feet.
You know what I love about Addie?
I love her laugh. I love her smile. I love that she is an easy baby almost all of the time.
But mostly I just love that I love her. It has been such an unexpected joy having Addie in my life. It's a crazy thing to say, of course, because I had two other kids whom I love and adore and so I should have known what to expect.
I think back to those months before she was born. I was terrified about having another baby. I could hardly parent two kids, let alone three. How would I get Sydney to school? How would Jules handle having a younger sibling? How could I endure the sleepless nights, the post-partum depression, the months of rainy weather being stuck in a house? How would I ever get anything done without losing my mind?
How would I love this baby?
The answer is: I just do. I've loved everything about her. Loved the sleepless nights. Loved the being-stuck-in-the-house with her. Loved taking her school and nursing her between classes. I'm sure me being on medication helps a lot, but I also know that God gave me Addie and my soul lept in surprised joy.
Adelynn Harriet. Addie Hattie. Addiekins.